9/11 REMEMBERED

You'll probably never forget exactly where you were and what you were doing on the morning of September 11, 2001.

Excuse the cliche, but it really was one of those defining moments of a generation.

Growing up, I remember my parents telling me how they would never forget where they were when JFK was shot. The terrorist attacks of 9/11 will stay with me in the same way. My children were not born yet, so they won't have that memory. For them, 9/11 will be taught in history class, just as JFK's assassination was taught to us.

Five years ago today, I remember sitting at my desk and watching, on my television screen, as that second plane hit the World Trade Center. I remember knowing immediately that our country was under attack. And I remember rushing home to pack and head to New York, despite protests from my husband.

Airplanes had been grounded and trains weren't running, so my colleagues and I drove north.

It seemed that we worked around the clock, as most members of the media did during that time. Even when I did make it back to my hotel room, I couldn't sleep. I'd continue to watch the coverage on the 24-hour news channels and sob and sob. I couldn't cry at work -- I was too busy -- so this was how I dealt with doing stories of unspeakable loss and devastation all day. It took a psychological toll on me like no other news event ever had.

This, the 5-year anniversary, is the only time I've allowed myself to relive those memories. Watching the memorial services in New York, Shanksville and at the Pentagon today has been difficult, and a bit teary.

Yesterday, my mother gave my little boy a commemorative set of die-cast rescue vehicles -- exact replicas of those used by FDNY on 9/11.

He enjoyed playing with them, and my mom hinted I should tell him their significance.

At three-and-a-half, I don't think he's old enough to absorb the tragedy of that day. When the time is right, I'll talk to him (and my daughter) about my experiences and recollections, as I'm sure millions of other parents will do with their children.

I'm left wondering, however, what the defining moment of my children's lifetime will be. I can only hope that it won't be as devastating as what we saw on September 11, 2001.

V.